Why can't I feel a flash of sparks or anything resembling passion to anything other than him? Does a person have just a certain capacity of passion allotted to them and if used majorily on one activity or one person, there's really none left to distribute to others?
Anyway, I haven't wanted to even blog about anything going on in my life or in my head because I'm scared. To give you a feel, here's a text that my BFF sent tonight about what's been going on and what is going to/could happen tomorrow, next week, months from now:
Just acknowledge that you are heading into a storm and I guess it'll be okay, but remember you always have the power to walk out.Previous texts of hers were of her conceding that this may kill me, but that she'll be here when it does. And though this is the most terrifed I've ever felt in my life because I'm basically knowingly walking steadily towards my doom, there is a level of comfort that I'll at least have her to pick up my shattered pieces at the end.